Just Hold Me
by the Beauty of Nightmares
Summary: SPOIERS FOR LORD OF SHADOWS (you were warned before the summary for a reason) - Ty isn't dealing well with his sister's death, but maybe Kit knows a way he can help. Sad, kinda fluffy one-shot for Kitty. (One shot)


**Author's note: I haven't written in a while so this may not be as good as some of my other stuff, but I finished Lord of Shadows yesterday and woke up with this story in my head and had to get it out. Constructive criticism is always welcome but don't be a mean about it please, it is unnecessary.**

 **DISCLAIMER: I do not own any of the characters or background story, Cassie Clare does. I just own this plot.**

He hadn't moved in days. Everyone had tried to get him to eat, but eventually gave up and just left the food and drink in his room until the next person who came in to attempt to get him back to normal. He sometimes picked or nibbled at the food and took a few sips of the water after they left. He had had to use the restroom a couple of times. He hadn't showered. He hadn't slept. He hadn't cried. Tiberius Blackthorn hadn't moved from the spot on his bed where he sat rocking himself for more than a minute at a time since the day his other half was killed. Since the day Livy, his twin sister, was killed.

Ty knew the routine his Emma, Christina, and his siblings had been following every time they came into his room. They all knocked first, then proceeded to slowly and quietly walk towards his bed, always carrying a tray of food and water. They would place the food at the foot of his bed before sitting in a chair next to him. If they tried to touch or talk to him, Ty just rocked away, never responding to anything they did or said. After a while, whoever was there would eventually leave. That's how, somewhere in the back of his clouded mind, Ty knew it was someone different when the door to his room just opened without the smell of food entering, and the footsteps that followed were loud and quick.

When the person sat on the bed next to him instead of in the chair, Ty didn't have to look up to know who had entered his room. It was Kit Herondale. Kit didn't say anything. At first, he just sat next to Ty, as if he was waiting for Ty to move away from him. When there was no movement, Kit scooted a bit closer and encircled Ty in his arms, but didn't hold him so tight that he wouldn't be able to move away if he wanted. Since there was no reaction after a few minutes, Kit held Ty a bit tighter. This pattern went on for a while. Kit would hold Ty a little tighter, wait a few seconds for a reaction, and, when none came, Kit would squeeze a bit harder before waiting again.

For a long time, Ty just stayed with his arms around his knees, which were pulled up against his chest. As the hold Kit had on Ty became even tighter than the hug they'd shared on the roof of the London Institute, Ty could feel his mind clearing bit by bit. It was as though every time Kit's arms got tighter, Ty's mind got a bit clearer. Suddenly, the grief that the shock had been suppressing for days took over. All Ty could do was melt into Kit's arms and start sobbing.

After the shock of Ty's sudden break down wore off, Kit, not knowing what else to do, put one of his arms under Ty's knees and scooped the shaking boy onto his lap before quickly replacing his arm around Ty's lower back. Ty responded by burying his face into Kit's shoulder and putting his arms around Kit's neck. They sat like that for a long time. With Ty curled up in Kit's lap as Kit held Ty's shuddering body as tightly as he could as he could, just let the other boy cry. Neither of them said anything or moved at all, except for Kit rocking Ty slightly to try and calm him.

When he had woken up a few days ago in the Los Angeles Institute and found out that his sister hadn't survived, Ty hadn't felt anything besides shock. As Kit sat quietly and held him, everything that his mind had been too cloudy to feel before came flooding out. The grief of the loss, the confusion of what exactly had happened, the loneliness of his life without the one person who'd been with him even before he was born, and the fear of what he was going to do without her. She was the one who'd always understood him and had known exactly what he thought before he even thought it. They had started planning to become parabatai, but, if he were honest with himself, they'd always been each other's parabatai, they just hadn't had the runes.

As hours passed, Ty continued to cry as new emotions bubbled to the surface by the minute, but both boys were beginning to get sore from their positions. Kit was ready to just deal with it for the sake of the other boy, but Ty, whose neck was cramping, felt the other boy's struggle to hold still and decided to move. Ty pulled one of his curled legs between them and shifted until he was facing the other boy with his legs wrapped around Kit's waist. Ty gently pushed Kit against his pillows so the other boy could lean back a bit before laying his head down on Kit's chest and allowing the sobs to consume him again.

As Kit held the boy, he couldn't help but think of Livvy. He thought of her unceasing charisma and attitude. How, even as they were becoming friends, she'd always put Ty first. At first, she was constantly reminding him that if he was going to leave, he should refrain from getting too close to Ty, and, later, telling him how it would crush Ty if he went away. He remembered how when she asked him if he'd always be her friend and he'd replied, "of course, friends always." It was after they'd almost kissed a second time. It suddenly hit him: Kit had been the only person Livvy ever kissed.

They'd been talking, and she'd spontaneously asked him to kiss her. When he'd asked her why she wanted him to kiss her, she'd responded that she'd never been kissed before and thought that Kit would be a suitable first kiss. Kit smiled at the memory. He'd never wanted her before they kissed and didn't see her as more than a friend after, but for that one moment, Kit had wanted to kiss her so badly. He remembered how, just for a minute, he'd looked at her differently and seen how beautiful she was. He remembered how amazing the kiss had felt. Kit recollected how, when he'd asked her if he was a decent first kiss, she'd been surprised that Kit hadn't just chastely kissed her but, he had, as she put it, "put his back into it." Most of all, he remembered when he told her he'd kissed her like that because "Herondales don't do perfunctory kisses" and she'd laughed. Livvy hadn't laughed because what he had said was funny, though. She'd laughed because it was the first time he called himself a Herondale. Kissing Livvy was the first time he started feeling like a Herondale, like a shadowhunter, and, now, she was gone.

Kit was shaken out of his thoughts as Ty withdrew one of his arms from around Kit's neck. He looked down at Ty, who reached up and softly brushed a tear from Kit's eye before putting his arm back around Kit's neck and snuggling back into his chest as his crying slowed. Kit realized that, since Livvy died, he'd been so worried about Ty, that he hadn't thought too much about Livvy herself, just the effects of her death. Thinking of her, Kit buried his face in Ty's neck and allowed himself to miss her.

The two boys sat holding each other for a few more hours before Kit realized that the exhaustion of not sleeping for days had finally caught up with Ty. Kit listened as Ty's breathing calmed and slowed until, finally, Ty was asleep. Unsure if moving too much would wake him, Kit gently moved one of Ty's legs from around his waist and rolled over onto his side. He looked at the sleeping boy in front of him on last time before laying his head on a pillow and drifting off with him.

 _The next morning_

Julian walked towards his little brother's room expecting the same thing he'd seen since Livvy had died. Their sweet, little, Livvy. He couldn't blame Ty for being so unresponsive. As long as Julian could remember, if Ty couldn't find the right words for something or didn't know what to do in a situation, Livvy would be right there, and now she wasn't. As he neared Ty's room, he saw Emma and Christina standing outside the room giggling and talking quietly to each other.

"What's going on?" Julian whispered to his parabatai and her best friend.

"See for yourself." Emma giggled quietly as the two girls stepped away from the door, allowing Julian to open it and see what they were talking about.

Ty and Kit were tangled up with each other on Ty's bed sound asleep. Ty and Kit's foreheads leaned against each other on one of Kit's arms that they were both using as a pillow. Ty had one arm draped over Kit's neck and one leg over Kit's upper thigh with his foot touching the back of Kit's knee. Kit's arm that wasn't acting as a pillow was wrapped snuggly around Ty's waist, and one of Kit's legs was in between Ty's while his other leg was outstretched so that their feet touched at the bottom of the bed. Ty's other arm was between the two boys with his hand fisted in Kit's t-shirt as though he were worried Kit would leave.

Julian turned around, intending to shut the door and exit the room, before quickly pulling out his cell phone and snapping a few pictures before leaving. As he closed the door and looked at the two girls, he grinned. Not only was it adorable, but he knew it was the first time either boy had slept since Livvy died. Emma smiled back.

"You took pictures?" she questioned lightly.

"Livvy isn't here to do it," Julian said, the little grin leaving his face as he thought of how overjoyed his sister would have been to see the two boys snuggled up together.

 _A few hours later_

Kit stirred a bit as the smell of bacon wafted through the room. He blinked his eyes a few times before catching sight of the breakfast tray on Ty's table and hearing the door shut. Kit looked down when he felt Ty starting to move as well.

"Is that bacon, Watson?" he asked, still mostly asleep.

"Why don't you check it out, Sherlock." Kit smiled as Ty opened his eyes and looked straight at him.

"Thanks for holding me last night," Ty said as he let out a little chuckled when he noticed their current predicament. Kit looked down as well and smiled at Ty before the two boys started to untangle themselves from each other.

"No problem. I think I needed it too." Kit said shyly glancing away from Ty.

"Just so you know, if there is food in here, that means my one or more of my siblings were in here, so they saw this," Ty paused, gesturing to where the boys' legs were still entangled together, "and if they saw this, they definitely took at least a few pictures and shared them with everyone in the house. Consider this your fair warning for the looks we are going to get from them." Ty finished with a small smile on his face.

"Well, it seems you've solved a mystery before we had it." Neither boy made a move to move their legs, but Ty did reach over and grab the tray of food from his table and place it between the two boys before he grabbed at the bacon. As they ate, the boys talked and laughed with each other, neither bringing up the piece of their conversation they both felt missing.

"I just realized," Ty said, looking slightly embarrassed, "I need to go to the bathroom. I'll be right back." Kit laughed as Ty jumped up and ran to his bathroom.

Suddenly, Kit jumped for his dagger as he saw a shimmer in the corner of the room before immediately dropping it upon realizing what, or rather who, the shimmer was.

 _"I needed to make sure he'd be okay before I could go. Thank you."_

Kit watched as she disappeared, knowing she'd done what she needed to. She wasn't coming back, but it was ok because they had each other and she knew it. The fact that she could go was her way of telling him everything would be ok.

 **Ok guys, thanks for reading. Sorry if this was majorly depressing and I just ruined your day. If I did, I have a couple fluffy one-shots that will counteract the sadness, so y'all should go check those out. Other than that, I think I may have another chapter for my Lord of the Flies fanfic** ** _Lord of the Cries_** **so if y'all have read that and are pissed I haven't updated in 6 months, you finally get chapter 7, and if you haven't read it you get to see the first 7 chapters all at once. Okay bye.**

 **XOXO – the Beauty of Nightmares**


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